bachelor parties and freedom in love

after watching “the hangover” last night, (which was funny but definitely no “old school”) i really began to think about the concept of bachelor parties… from my days of working at a burlesque club during college, i realized how horrendous they truly are… in fact, i stayed away from them because marriage is sacred to me…. i wouldn’t want to marry any of those bachelors that came in to the club after seeing how they behaved! i actually felt sorry for the women who may or may not know what kind of man they are going to share their lives with. and though i don’t know what these men are about in their day to day lives, you can gage a man’s integrity easily in a bachelor party environment…. are these men really ready to get married if they feel like they have to get explicit with other women in order to go through with it?…or participate in this debauchery as a rite of passage? if you still need to “sew your wild oats” as they say – then why commit to one woman? why should they get married if they truly feel like marriage is a prison and this is their “last day of freedom…” what a sad perception of marriage…and how would they honestly feel if their woman was acting in similar fashion??? one can easily justify this behavior as “one night of fun” but in reality our actions have meaning… and is this the tone you want to be setting for your marriage with the love of your life? 

why can’t marriage be a celebration of love?! a weekend of friends/families/lovers partying and sharing and getting crazy without the need for getting obscene and (fill in the blank)? why can’t marriage be thought of as adventures in love? maybe the couple should do a tantric sex workshop together in preparation for their marriage? i don’t know… i just think if marriage is now about LOVE in our current state of evolution- then why are some men (and women) perceiving it as the opposite of love- an infringement of freedom to where we must revolt and have the most “free” night of our lives before we are locked in a cage! i want the most free crazy adventurous nights to be with the one i love! to each their own… just something to think about…

Alex Grey’s “Kissing”

Alex-Grey-Kissing

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3 thoughts on “bachelor parties and freedom in love

  1. megan says:

    “a weekend of friends/families/lovers partying and sharing” — that’s exactly what our wedding was!!! i wish you were there lady. you were very missed.
    but anyway, yeah, I’m super glad that instead of a bachelor party the night before, Aaron hung out with me and all of our friends at his best man’s place. it was better than anything!

    • andreebelle says:

      you get what it’s about!!!! ahhhh i wish i was there so badly!!!!! i know it was incredible! you are such a beautiful couple!!! love u friend!!!

  2. duchessinc says:

    I totally agree with you on this. If you’re worried about being with one person for the rest of your life you’re def not saddling up with the right person. It’s a gift, a journey a blessing to share and grow and expand together. Not some infringement of your personal freedom. Couldn’t agree more. Getting married reminds me of a quote about living your purpose, “How do you know what your purpose is? If you’re living it you won’t be asking yourself that question any longer.” I think when you find the right one you’re not asking that question anymore about whether or not it’s the right one.

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